It's during the breaks between sessions, where I'm going back and forth from one lecture hall to another that I keep making eye contact with a girl behind the counter at the registration table. Brunette with curves in all the right places. A little mole on her chin, just about where it becomes her cheek. And she's got a cute smile, similar to mine where her eyes almost shut. She smiles at me just like that everytime I see her. But as I don't know anybody there besides my boss, I never approach her. Frankly, after the conference ended, I didn't think about her again for a year.
2010, now we're in DC and I actually get to talk to her a bit between sessions but that year we also had one of the largest group of people from our agency make the trip so I was busy herding cats some days while others when I did have a few minutes, I was sightseeing. I managed to walk the entire length of the Mall, from the Capitol building all the way to the Lincoln Monument and visited every Smithsonian along the way. No way I was walking all the way back though. I took the Metro from Georgetown station back towards my hotel. I wish I had thought to look for the Exorcist stairs while I was nearby.
Anyway, Jennifer and I didn't really get to talk much but still plenty of eye contact and smiles in each other's direction throughout the week.
In 2011, I missed out on the conference in San Francisco because that happened the same week dad went into the hospital. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself if I had left and something had happened. I know I repaid the agency for whatever costs they were out because I cancelled the day I was going to fly out. But while I didn't see her that year, upon the return of our office manager, she told me Jennifer had specifically asked about me and why I had missed the conference. I took that as a sign that I was missed. Thinking I'm going to finally do something the following year.
2012, the conference is back in New Orleans and I even arrived a few days early just to go sightseeing. I ended up spending most of my time with our legal counsel. She was cool to hang out with as we were pretty close in age. But during my time back at the hotel, I would make sure I stopped and spoke with Jennifer every chance I got and the first full night of the conference when everyone started making plans to head out to Bourbon Street, I asked her if she wanted to come out with our group. We had a few spots we were planning on hitting up. She declined because she had to be up and ready early to set up the registration table. Aww, men... Sorry to hear that. Can't you at least come out for a little bit? I'm really trying to get to spend some time with her on a more social level than what our interactions have been up to this point these last few years now. No, sorry... Sheepish, apologetic smile and even that head tilt thing to let me know she just can't possibly. Alright, hopefully another night while we're all here in NOLA. Flash forward a few hours later on Bourbon Street, I'm with my group, a few strands of beads hanging off me. I'm pretty sure I had a drink in my hand. Gotta love open container laws. 😂 And walking up the street towards us is Jennifer and the other two members of the conference's executive team. They were quickly heading one direction and my group was going the other way. I just raised my drink in their direction and told Jennifer, "Good to see you could make it out tonight." Yeah, it was petty but, can you blame me? I was probably a bit cooler towards her for the rest of the week and every night I was back out with my group until the wee hours of the morning. Turns out, plenty of places on Bourbon Street really do have last calls.
2013's conference was in Orlando and also happened to be the year I took my girlfriend with me so definitely no nothing happening with Jennifer that year and nothing again in 2014 when the conference was held in St. Paul and I was still involved with my girl. Of course I saw Jennifer in Orlando and in St. Paul and I was polite. Cordial, even. At the time, I was in a relationship and out of respect for that, I wasn't going to go out of my way to strike up a conversation with her. It's funny that the conference gala featured an open bar for the celebration. Partly because, being in St. Paul, there really wasn't anywhere for us to go to celebrate afterwards. Not much night life, if you can believe it. lol.
Of course, that changed in 2015 and the conference was down in San Diego. For me, it was the easiest travel day ever. Got up a few hours before registration opened, packed my bags and drove on down the 5. Easy peasy. I didn't spend much time talking to Jennifer that year either. I had noticed a few of the other attendee regulars were monopolizing her free time. Like, literally every time I walked through during sessions, one or both of these guys were all over her. I thought it was weird because I knew both guys were/are married. I don't know them well enough to know if they would cheat on their wives, if they believe in the 500-mile rule or if they just enjoyed the company of an attractive women who literally could not get away because she's working. Either way, I didn't spend hardly any time with her that week. Not that it really should have mattered. I was supposed to have a friend/hook-up come down to see me before the end of the week. She and I had been messaging one another for weeks, I even got a handful of pictures of some creative angles of her in bed. So I wasn't too upset I wasn't getting any Jennifer time. At least I wasn't until my hook-up suddenly blew up at me over why *I* expected her to "drop everything" just to come down and see me in San Diego!?! Um... because this is literally like the thing we both had been talking about for a while now. This wasn't just me making any demands, she was asking me about the view from the room just a few days before and then wanted to know how long she could stay. WTF??? San Diego was a bust on all fronts. The one saving grace that the conference provided, and it turned out to continue for the next several years was that I somehow became a magnet for drink tickets. Even though everyone started the gala night with 2 drink tickets, somehow, everyone was giving me their 'extra' ticket and in some cases, both their drink tickets. It would be rude of me to turn them down now, wouldn't it? And on one of my many trips to get a refill at the bar, the NATOA President ran into me, we talked for a bit and she had a roll of drink tickets with her. I didn't even ask and she peeled off at least 7 drink tickets for me right there. Let's let that sink in for a bit... KNOWING I started the night with the two that came with dinner, Jodie took 7 drink tickets from the roll and gave them to me. As far as she knew, I was now up to 9 drinks, if I didn't share any with other people. She didn't know I had another 4 extra tickets already in my pocket. Lucky 13. And that's before we ever left the hotel to go wherever we were going for the after-party.
2016, the conference was in Austin and if I was getting cockblocked in San Diego, Austin was even worse because it was the hometown of one of the dudes that had been hitting on Jennifer the year before. Still married but taking up even more of her time than last year. Oh well... 🤷🏽♂️
In 2017 NATOA was in Seattle and I'll admit, I enjoyed myself in the city. And this time around, while I was speaking with Jennifer and hanging out at the registration table with her often, I wasn't actively pursuing her attention as I had before. Just doing my own thing with the other attendees. And in fact, the night of the big gala, where once again I was hammered with too many drink tickets. No, seriously. I started the night with 2 and pretty much everybody at my table, all 6 of them, gave me their extra ticket. Then the table next to us gave me 4. THEN, my GM went out into the hallway and talked with one of the vendors about something and they both came back, the vendor gave me another 4... I literally could not keep up with all the alcohol. How often have you EVER heard me say that? After the gala itself, we had a group of people trying to track down some college bar for the after-party of drinking, dancing and karaoke. Everyone ended up taking different Ubers to the bar and the group I ended up with started with 6 and we started to load in. Local girl stayed up front with the driver and I piled in the 3rd row with one of the women I had been talking to waiting for the ride. By the time we were pulling away, our group of 6 ended up being just the 3 of us. Girl in the front and me and this lady all the way in the back. I could blame what happened next on the alcohol so I'm going to do exactly that. Let's be honest, I had at least a 18 bottles of beer going through me by that point so logic and reason were foreign concepts to me by that point. So, in the backseat as the Uber's driving us around, I looked down and noticed my lady friend's dress had ridden up exposing plenty of nylon-clad knee. I just reached down and started massaging it. I heard her catch her breath and tense up for just a second. I waited. She relaxed and ever so slightly turned her knee towards me, closer to my leg. Well, that's just an invitation if you ask me. I was stroking her leg pretty much from the top of her calf to her knee to just about the hem of her dress and a little underneath/inside her thigh. I think if the drive to the bar had lasted any longer, I would have been further up her dress than I ended up. To be honest, the rest of the night was kind of a blur. More drinks, at that bar I ran into a friend from high school who had been in town for a concert with her sister. Utterly random. Dancing, karaoke, a stop at Dick's. Some burger stand that somebody local referred to as "Seattle's In-N-Out." Pssh, hardly. More like the old .25 cent hamburger stand. Uber back to the hotel for the after-after-party in one of the suite's that the past president was booked in. I left probably around 3 am to get SOME sleep because my airport shuttle was picking me up around 8 a.m.
2018 everything went kind of wild in Philadelphia. I briefly saw Jennifer in the first couple of days after I arrived and the first big group event of that year was a trip to the ballpark to watch the Phillies. While I was hanging out, catching up with my conference brethren, it was the one and only year my editor was invited to go on the trip and at the game, he struck up a conversation with someone else who was also new. They had met earlier in the day at the first-time attendees mixer, so they just kept chatting away at the game. She would make a return appearance the following night when she was invited to our chapter dinner. The eatery had some video games, pinball and a pool table. Jennifer also dropped by and ended up sitting out on the patio with the regular guys who were always on her. NBD at this point for me. I sat to watch the pool game between my editor and new girl, Elizabeth. And during her turns to shoot, she keeps wandering over, closer and closer to me. Before long, she's standing in front of me so the only thing I see while my editor's taking his turn is her backside. And I'm not gonna lie, it was a pretty nice view. A few turns later and she's alternated from nearly straddling my right leg to standing between my open legs. I'm pretty sure I'm in the clear when her next break, I'm holding her by the hips as she rocks back and forth. The next time she comes over in tracing the seams on her jeans. At the waist, her back pockets, her inseam .. yeah, I'm pretty much groping her at this point. About 20 seconds at a time, between her turns to shoot pool. This goes on for about half an hour before we all decide to head back to the hotel. It was after midnight and they had sessions to go to that morning, I was moderating another. As we start walking, the same group of people we were with were STILL out on the patio drinking, smoking and chatting it up. We wave at them goodnight and we slowly head back the 6 blocks.
Back at the hotel, I tell my editor to go on ahead, I'll make sure Elizabeth gets back to her room safely. What can I say, ever the gentleman. Back at her room I kiss her goodnight and we're suddenly in the entryway to her room making out, panting, aggressive until maybe 15 minutes later just as clothes were starting to come off, she stops us. I think you better go. With a heavy sigh and a drop of my head in acknowledgement, I hesitantly agree and head back to the elevators and who do I meet exiting the elevator as I reach it, Jennifer. She was a little taken aback to see me. I quickly said, just walking Elizabeth back to her room, making sure she got back safe. Jennifer nods and smiles, ok. Goodnight. Considering the headstart we had on the group we left back at the restaurant and the fact that I was just now heading up to my room after dropping off Elizabeth, it wouldn't take a genius to realize it took me far too long to have just "dropped her off." Hah. I mean, I tried, TRIED to make some headway with Jennifer but she wasn't giving me a chance and let's face it, how many years should I keep trying?
Weird dynamic started to happen when during a few lunch sessions when I started to chat with this girl from Washington State. She just happened to walk past looking for a table to sit at and our table had a couple of empty seats. I'm not gonna lie and say that I wasn't interested. A cute, thick, YOUNG redhead. OMG, she was young! 26, I think? Maybe 27? And during the evening mixers, we'd find each other to hang out with. Ok... Now this is a dilemma I've only seen on TV and in movies. And the middle night of the conference there was a massive group of us at one of the nearby bars. We had already hit this place up a couple of nights already. The second night was even karaoke and I can't remember what song I got up to do.
Anyway, 3rd night at the bar, Red's mingling, I'm at one of the tables our group hoarded, sitting next to Elizabeth and Jennifer shows up and sits at the table directly across from me. I know I reacted unusually because she said something about it. As we start that banal chitchat, Elizabeth strikes up a conversation with the guy sitting next to her and slowly turns her back completely to me as she gets fully involved in her exchange. I visually overreact to make a show of it to Jennifer, just to get a laugh. And she does. So now that I have an audience, I turn into a child when I start harassing Elizabeth in her convo. Oh, I'll admit, it was totally petty and childish what I started to do. But like I said, I was playing for my audience and her laugh. I make a big show to nudge or lean into Elizabeth who at first throws her shoulder back at me. I keep it up. Her elbow comes back to let me know I need to stop. But you know I won't. I look over to Jennifer and smile conspiratorially at her. Elizabeth's still trying to stay focused on her interaction when I finally poke. One was all it took as she swatted her hand back towards me and scooted away from me. I turn and raise my eyes in 'shock' at Jennifer and we both share a laugh. We kind of sit there awkwardly sharing the moment and got distracted when Elizabeth and the guy both get up and head to the bar together. As we watch them walk away, Jennifer and I turned back to look at one another, mouths comically agape in mock shock. That latest a few seconds as one of the cockblockers came over, barely acknowledged me and told Jennifer, "Hey, we're all gonna go to this other place..." and he keeps talking to the point where I just excuse myself and head back to the hotel. Typical.
The following day there was a bit of a turn of events. Once again, Red joined my table for lunch, we sat next to one another during the sessions and agreed to meet up downstairs in the hotel to walk over to Reading Terminal Market for the big mixer event that night. The organization rented out Reading Terminal just for our group. A few of the vendors and eateries were open just for us and it was all paid for, including the alcohol. After finding a few things to eat and drink, Red and I spent the entire rest of the time of the mixer sitting at an open lunch counter just getting to know one another. It was really just chill, cool. As the event shut down, a massive group of us went across the street to a sports bar and another group about the same size went to look for another karaoke bar. The sports bar was desolate though. Our group was literally the customers in the place. Most of the rest of our group decided they wanted to find that karaoke bar. Meanwhile just a handful of us stayed for a drink. Myself, Red, my editor and a couple others. A couple of drinks and we all decide to head back to the hotel. Red and I aren't quite arm in arm but we're pretty damn close to it, practically leaning into one another for those couple of blocks. I am DEFINITELY walking her to her door.
We get back to the hotel and sitting in the lobby of the hotel bar is my agency's attorney. We wave as we walk by and hw stops us, flags us over and invites us to join him for a drink. Well, it would be rude of us to turn down this generosity so we so join him. A few drinks in and he starts talking about work. Ok, now he can write this off as an expense b Clever! 😉 And before we know it, he's railing against my GM. Well shit... Everything I've been complaining about for the past few years, he was already in tune to. What. The. FUCK?!? 😱 Oh my God! This started a flow .. we all just started talking about his useless he was. We weren't holding anything back. And unfortunately, this whole thing went on far too long for Red. She had checked out and I don't blame her. I offered to walk her up to her room but she politely declined. Yep, I fucked that one up by staying too long in the bar with our attorney.
The following night was the big gala and she was dressed in this blue velvet dress that just... Salt on the wound. Man, I fucked that up.
The after-party, we were kind of just bar/club hopping with our regular group. I saw Elizabeth in this red dress that fit her just right and a plunging neckline. Anyway, we come and go in a few different places for the next few hours and then sometime after midnight we all (there were maybe 10 of us left at this point) were all dancing in this gay club. And the only reason I knew it was a gay club was because everyone in the group made it a point to repeatedly tell everyone else that we were going to a gay club. Geez, Minnesota, relax. It's no big deal. It's just a club where even the guys know how to dance.
I have a few more beers and end up on the dance floor opposite Jennifer. We were probably out there a good half-hour, 45 minutes just working up a sweat. The conference was officially over, a lot of people were flying home in the morning, they started trickling out one by one. I was staying an extra day just to do more sightseeing but I left the club with the last of them and just outside the front doors, the regulars ask stopped for their mandatory smoke break. I gave Jennifer a pleading look. She smiled with her eyes and imperceptibly shrugged her shoulders. This is goodnight then. I bid my adieu and wished them all a safe trip home as I headed up and thinking about my plans for the morning.
I managed to get in most everything I wanted to visit that last day before the rain came down. It wasn't heavy, not like Florida or New Orleans were. But it was a good downpour. As I was heading back to my room, I ran into Jennifer and Tonya in the lobby. Tonya was Jennifer's boss. They were waiting for their shuttle to the airport. They had already checked out and had their luggage at the porter's station out front. After a few minutes, Jennifer has that nervous look as she's eyeing in the direction of the restrooms. She excuses herself only to come back almost immediately.
"That was fast."
"No, the reasons are only for hotel guests. I don't have my key card anymore."
"Oh?,* I asked. "Here, use mine." She quickly thanked me and before she even turns to walk away, Tonya flippantly says, "After all these years, she finally got your room key." 😶 Wut? Jennifer instantly turned the deepest shade of red I've ever seen that wasn't sunburnt. Her eyes go wide as she turned and did her best to not run away after that comment from Tonya. I sat there in stunned silence for about a minute then the only thing I could think of to say was, "If only I had known sooner."
You have to admit, that was kind of a bombshell to drop on me after nearly a decade. Seriously, since 2009 we've been like this oscillating wave pattern where it seems like we're getting close then veering off to the opposite sides of the country for the next 11 1/2 months. It's been... Well, it's been nothing but a long, drawn out tease for all this time.
We soon said our goodbyes once again and we wouldn't see one another again until:
Tampa Bay, 2019. What made Tampa an interesting mix was that it also happened to be Elizabeth's home town. Well, maybe not exactly but it was less than a 2-hour drive for her. Just far enough that she stayed at the hotel with the rest of the conference folks. And once again, I was totally blocked out by one of the same guys as always. But I ended up spending MUCH more time with Elizabeth this trip. So much so that I think several of the other attendees thought we were a thing. Every session seated next to one another, lunches together and wherever the party went out at night, we'd end up be each other's side until the end of the night when I'd walk her back to her room and a hug and kiss goodnight. Yeah, I guess we had become one of those conference couples by that point culminating in the second to last night on the party cruise. By that point, I'm positive everyone else just assumed we were a thing the way we were acting out. Then the after -party in one of the vendor's suite. I think Florida had JUST become a 'green state" and this vendor brought his own massive stash. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE was partaking. Including Elizabeth. Although, I don't think she was ready for the effects and needed to get back to her room ASAP. Lol. I walked her back and an all-too brief make out session where we were borderline groping one another in front of her room door for several minutes before she finally broke it up and said goodnight. That was nice.
I wandered my way back to the party and spent the next couple of hours people watching. Folks that I've known several years now acting in ways I never expected lol. A couple of PIOs from a city I worked with, married women in their late 40s, were throwing themselves at some of younger guys from Texas. Honestly, I think the boys were scared a little by their aggressiveness.
The next and final night of the conference was the gala and Elizabeth wore this incredibly form fitting black and blue floral print dress. She looked incredible. The after party was in Ybor City where we went bar hopping at a few spots with a pretty sizable group that last night. And a few hours in, Elizabeth once again needed to go. Like right then and there. I said goodnight to the party crew, we got into an Uber and after a few moments of quiet, we started making out in the backseat of the driver's car. Lol. I left him a pretty good tip. We behaved walking through the hotel lobby until we got into the elevator and we were pawing at each other once again. The walk down the corridor to her room, we were acting like teenagers, unable to keep our hands off each other. We got to her room and after a few more minutes, she invited me in for a nightcap.
I didn't stay the night, she had to drive home the following morning and I needed to pack up my stuff although my flight back wasn't until almost 3.
We kept in touch but living on opposite coasts, the time zone differences made staying in touch problematic. Plus she still had a couple of teenagers at home so when she was off work, she was dealing with their lives as well.
2020 was supposed to have been in Denver but with the world shutting down, everything got cancelled. The following year the conference was virtual. That was awkward as working out of the office meant I was still working while attempting to attend virtual sessions. Plus no time whatsoever to socialize with anyone.
This year the conference was in Denver. To make up for the missed 2020 event. I didn't get to attend due to my agency's dire financial situation.
Elizabeth got married earlier this year. She must have met the guy during the pandemic and things flourished. Good for her.
Jennifer, I have no idea what her status is at this point.
But the 2023 conference is scheduled to be in Long Beach in October. Lol
My month and practically in my backyard? Are you kidding me?! I can't wait.
